A great memory care community will provide your loved one with excellent team members, a stimulating environment and a place where they feel at home. With a variety of options, it can be overwhelming to decide which community is best. Even before finding a community, having a discussion with your loved one about moving to a memory care community can be challenging.
We are here to help. We understand that moving someone close to you into a higher level of care can be difficult. The guides and videos below can help ease the transition. The topics include:
When Is It Time
You want your loved one to get the care they need. Deciding what kind of community is right for them is a big decision. It is normal to feel overwhelmed. Take a deep breath and remind yourself you’re beginning to research out of care and concern for your loved one.
Begin by exploring the various living options available to seniors in this blog. It will inform and empower you on your path to find the right community for your loved one. You can also begin by exploring the differences between an assisted living community and a memory care community.
Although it’s hard, it’s best to start these conversations as early as possible–when your loved one can weigh in on what they want in the place they live. It’s crucial to take time with decisions like these so that all parties feel heard and respected. Both you and your loved one deserve the chance to consider as many options as possible. Even with the best planning, these can be emotional conversations. While you’re having them, it’s extremely important to remain respectful of your loved one’s thoughts and feelings. Although it might be difficult, you'll be glad once you’ve talked it through.
The story of Ron, Connie and their children is a common one in terms of a family deciding what was best for their loved one when they began to show signs of memory loss.
Meet Ron & Connie: I Will Do What’s Best for My Family
Dementia vs Alzheimer's: Understanding the Difference
It’s common to hear the terms “dementia” and “Alzheimer’s” used interchangeably. Though revolving around the same topic, they are not the same thing and it's important to understand the difference between them. This guide Dementia vs Alzheimer’s: Understanding the Difference will help you better understand your loved one’s diagnosis and what it means for their care.
For some people, like Linda, who is featured in the video below, dementia day care is the right way to support a loved one who has early-onset dementia.
Day Care for Early-Onset Dementia
What to Look for
Every memory care community is unique, but there are some common elements to all of them that you should look for when you’re deciding which is right for your loved one.
Quality of life is very much achievable for individuals experiencing Alzheimer's disease, dementia or another form of memory loss. The overall goal of a memory care community is to create a specialized plan that maintains the residents' dignity, something we all deserve.
Some life-improving benefits to look for include diligently-followed safety protocols, a calm and reassuring environment, a custom health care plan, and above all, dignity and quality of life.
You will also want to know exactly what components of care services are offered in a memory care community. All memory care communities managed by The Goodman Group offer core services to keep your loved one as happy and cared for as possible. This list includes:
- Healthy, consistent meals
- Medication management and care
- Clean, well-maintained environments
- Programs focused on physical and cognitive health
- Neighborhoods that offer a sense of community
- Opportunities for residents to have meaning and purpose
Visiting a memory care community
When you visit a memory care community it’s important to come ready to ask questions. There will be some questions specific to your loved one’s situation, but there are some general questions everyone should ask. This blog explains what those are and includes our complimentary Guide to Senior Living Tours provides a helpful list that you can download and bring with you when you visit a community.
Some of the things to look for during a visit include how the community is secured, what the dining and meal options are, how housekeeping and laundry are handled, if there are special visiting hours or rules, and what programming is available to residents. A good memory care community tries to improve people’s quality of life in noticeable ways, as Garry in this video can attest to for his wife.
How Memory Care Improved My Wife's Quality of Life
Approach to Care
The Goodman Group’s managed communities offer Pearls of Life® memory care, which recognizes the value of each individual and helps residents live dignified, well-rounded lives, discovering the treasures, or pearls, within.
Personalized Memory Care that Promotes Daily Success
Pearls of Life® memory care offers Montessori Inspired Lifestyle®, a positive approach to providing care for adults living with dementia or Alzheimer’s disease.
“Montessori originally was an educational system developed by a physician, Maria Montessori. She decided that the best way to enable and educate was to create individuals who were self-sufficient, confident, and able to make decisions about their own lives,” explains Dr. Cameron Camp, founder of the Center for Applied Research in Dementia.
Montessori is an educational method based on rehabilitation techniques and sound human values that has translated to great success for those with memory loss, regardless of where they are on the dementia journey. It allows residents to focus on their individual strengths and engage in meaningful activities.
Montessori Inspired Lifestyle®: Empowering People Living with Dementia
Montessori Inspired Lifestyle® is based on values of respect, dignity and equality. Its key principles are rooted in giving people choices, giving them the opportunity to use their strengths instead of their weaknesses, recognizing the individual for who they are, and enabling them to be the best person they can be.
Care Partner Resources
Helping a loved one select and move into a memory care community is not something most people have experience doing. Give yourself grace during this time. Below are resources that can help you. These include communication strategies, ways to address feelings of guilt, how to ease the transition to a new home and how to get the most out of your visits with your loved one.
Communication Strategies
Caring for individuals living with Alzheimer’s disease, dementia and other forms of memory loss may require learning new communication skills. If you are a caregiver or have a loved one living with memory loss, we put together some communication tips that will help you to continue having meaningful, stimulating conversations with the person you love.
There will likely come a time when your usual way of talking with them isn’t getting the results either of you hoped for. Maybe your loved one is getting frustrated because you don't understand them, or they become upset because it's difficult to come up with the words they are thinking of. Some communication strategies for speaking with loved ones with dementia are:
- Talk face to face
- Use pleasant facial expressions and tone of voice
- Slow down your speech and use short sentences
- Use external cues
- Look past the literal
- Give them choices
- Exercise patience
There are numerous ways to make communication easier, but sometimes, it’s best to stop talking altogether, hold their hand and simply be.
As Alzheimer’s or dementia progresses, you will likely see your loved one’s behaviors change. It’s important to remember to be observant, empathic and above all, patient. Your loved one is likely acting out of fear or confusion based on their perceived reality. Here are a few coping tips based on common behaviors you may see from your loved one with Alzheimer’s or dementia.
Feelings of guilt
It’s normal to experience feelings of guilt when you are helping a loved one transition. Garry dealt with guilt while he was helping his wife move into a memory care community. He had moments where he felt bad because he was enjoying something and thought it wasn’t fair. His wise advice is that he thinks about things from the perspective of his wife and how she would want him to continue to enjoy his life as much as possible.
Addressing Guilt When Your Loved One Has Dementia
Easing the Transition
Many times, individuals hesitate to relocate their loved one from a known environment because they worry that adapting to a new place may accelerate their loved one’s memory impairment. This is not the case, and often the relocation is met with great relief. Finally, your loved one can enjoy life again and not worry about the day-to-day tasks that have become unmanageable. When your loved one requires a new level of support and care, helping them through the transition to memory care is one of the most loving acts you can do.
Visiting Your Loved One
Having a loved one with dementia takes some adjusting, but it won’t be as difficult as you may think. You can still get great value out of your visits with your loved one, and here are some tips to help.
At the beginning of each visit, say hello and use your loved one’s name or relationship to you. This will help trigger their memory so they do not have to think as hard. If your loved one doesn’t seem to recognize you, don’t take it personally. This is an effect that dementia can have, and it may or may not be recurring. Accept that they are where they need to be in the moment and try to adjust to sharing that moment with them. It’s best to stay in the moment and be present with each visit.
Cost Questions
Once you have selected a memory care community for your loved one, be prepared to connect with several people to discuss the financial component. This group could include financial advisors, caretakers, lawyers and community team members.
One of the first things to do is draft a power of attorney (POA) document. A POA is often required when moving to a memory care community. You will also be in contact with the community’s team members as a required physical assessment will take place on moving day to determine the level of care needed. To reserve an apartment, a rental agreement must be completed as well.
Cost Considerations
Not all memory care communities charge the same way. Some offer an all-inclusive rate while others offer time-based care packages or à la carte packages. To ensure your loved one receives the proper amount of care at an affordable rate, it's best to understand how these pricing models compare. The Goodman Group’s managed communities offer time-based care packages and some offer all-inclusive rates. A time-based care package means your loved one will be charged only for the help they need and nothing more.
Getting Documents Together
Many records will be required in order to move the process along. We suggest starting by collecting all legal, financial and medication information from your loved one. It is best practice to have a copy of every record your loved one has and keep it in a separate file for your reference. This should include:
- POA
- Bank accounts
- Pension, 401(k), annuity contracts
- Tax returns
- Savings bonds, stock certificates, brokerage accounts
- Business paperwork
- Property deeds
- Vehicle titles
- Driver’s license
- Social security card
- Living will
- Insurance card
- Long-term insurance policy
- Personal medical history
- Emergency contact sheet
Payment Methods
Once you have decided on a memory care community, they will share payment options. Two of the common options are automatic withdrawal and check payments.
It is important to work with a reputable financial institution to ensure you understand all terms and fees involved with payment. Speaking with team members at the memory care community is just as important so you understand what services are included, what care offerings are available à la carte and how the billing will work.
If you have long-term care insurance, it will cover part of your monthly costs. If your loved one is a veteran and qualifies for Veterans Aid and Attendance benefit, that will also contribute to the monthly expenses. A surviving spouse may also qualify. You can learn more about eligibility and how to apply for benefits at VeteranAid.org.
The methods of acceptable payment vary depending on types of communities and each specific community. It’s important to discuss whether or not Medicare and Medicaid will cover the cost of the memory care community you are considering for your loved one, or if they only accept private pay.
To cover the costs of living in a memory care community, your loved one can consider utilizing their assets from over the years such as their savings account, 401k(s), stocks, pensions or bonds. Additionally, there are a few tax credits, such as the Elderly or Disabled Tax Credit, that are available to those who are 65 years of age or older, or who are disabled and living in a long-term care community.
Find a Community
We understand this is a big process and one you may not be familiar with. Our team is here to help. Please contact us to discuss the best care for your loved one or click here to schedule a visit at a memory care community near you.
